Why I haven't loved my life.

I alluded to not being thankful for my life in my Thanksgiving Day post. Some may have felt I left too much unsaid. If that is the case for you, then I offer this post today to give you a piece of where I've been coming from.

Please note:

This post and those that will follow in the coming days, are part of a short story that will be published in the spring of 2014 by the Writers Unite to Fight Cancer. Maybe if you like these excerpts, you will chose to buy the book. All the proceeds go to fighting Cancer.

If you like my writing style, I'd love to have you join me here as a follower (if you haven't already) and even better for my pocket book, buy Dark Days of Promise and future books.

Excerpt (names have been changed.) 

Even worse than reporting the doctor's findings to my husband, Harrison, is coming to grips with reality. I have a sister who has lived with MS for roughly thirty years. The reunion when my older siblings decided to relieve her of motherhood responsibilities by doling out her children still haunts me. My sister, dealing so gracefully, is my role model. I praised her once, even going so far as to claim my willingness to have the same disease if I could be just like her. I'd been young and didn't realize what I was saying.

Now I shiver with terror. She fights her loss of balance, motor skills, cognitive powers, and refuses to succumb to needing a wheelchair except for the months she convalesced after falling and breaking her hip while hanging clothes on the clothesline. The day I received news of her heart attack scared the logical thought process from my brain for weeks. MS isn't hereditary, so how did I get it? What symptoms will haunt me?

Wishing you a Happy Thanksgiving

Giving thanks for family, friends, life and love. And really all that goes with it.

But just for fun I'd like to invite those visiting today to help me make a list of what we are thankful for.

Cyberspace - to help us stay in touch, even from our Ipads and cell phones. (Okay, not so much for the hackers that make life stressful at the worst possible times.)

The ability to communicate - whether by spoken word, written word, the strains of music or the quiet touch.

Speaking of touch… the touch of a loving pet, you know that cat rubbing up against your leg, a dog that bumps your hand with its nose, not to mention the purrs and the excited yips.

Loved ones - those who accept you as you are, even with your many flaws and gently invite you to grow. And even the estranged family member who hasn't communicated with you in so very long…maybe it is time to extend an olive branch and mend the broken connection. Too hard? Maybe pray for them and you to mend that gaping hole in your heart.

Laughter -- that means the ones that make you laugh, help you laugh at yourself as well as the endorphins released as you laugh. Even the chuckle counts, but the smile, when you are able to make a sound isn't enough.

I love my life. That sounds a little presumptuous, but it isn't meant that way. I've not always been able to say I love life and am thankful for it. You see, this past year has given me some very miraculous blessing concerning my life. I've had a year of change, for which I thankful. Explaining it all requires a separate and long post, as in roughly 5000 words. You are welcome to came back in the coming days to share it with me.

I'm thankful for those I love and those that love me in return, Love that is demonstrated in so many ways. Of course, for me there is the romantic love. I love my husband dearly and am very thankful for his unending patience.

And most of all, I am thankful for My Savior, Jesus Christ and His atonement. His grace humbles me every day. If I did a better job of keeping Him at the center of my life, I would be humbled every hour of every day. I am thankful for His love and His patience. May all of you feel His love in your lives.

What are you thankful for?

Dark Days of Promise excerpt.

"The high I get from killing another man is comparable to any other high. Sex, drugs, it's a rush ... and addicting."

You've got to be kidding! Abhorred, I tried to retreat without a sound until I forgot about the squeal of damp rubber soles on linoleum as I twisted around the door. The squeak echoed across the room. I cringed and hurried to escape, pulling the door closed as my feet took flight.

And you thought it might be safe to miss out on this book... right!

Sharing this on Face book, thought I ought to share here too.